We all think of the Declaration of Independence as a famous document that is an important part of American History — and that’s about it.
Here’s how it begins:
When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the laws of nature and of nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
But change the pronouns, and see how much it applies to YOU right now:
When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one… to dissolve the… bands which have connected [her] with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the laws of nature and of nature’s God entitle [her], a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that [she] should declare the causes which impel [her] to the separation.
That is, YOU are entitled to a ‘separate and equal’ place in life as anyone else is. And you are obliged to be clear about that.
Maybe you’re being treated badly in a relationship — perhaps by a boss, or a significant other. Maybe you believe you are stuck, and that there’s no way to change it. What if you believed you weren’t stuck — that you could change it or leave the relationship? What would that open up for you? You might begin to look for ways you could change yourself, so you react differently in the relationship. Or perhaps you’d begin to line up the resources (money, a new job or a place to live, transportation, etc.) so you could leave. Who knows what that would lead to? It might lead to a whole new life.
You also depend on your belief system. You believe that say, gravity exists, or the internal combustion engine works. In this physical reality, it’s all unquestionably true. Yet there are many beliefs you could question, beliefs about yourself or how the world works. What if you believed something different? What would that open up for you?
Perhaps you believe you lack some ability, like the ability to carry a tune (okay, this is one of mine), and that means you can never sing, at least not in public. But what if you believed that the ability to carry a tune was something you could learn? What would that open up for you? You’d search for a singing teacher who specialized in teaching people who ‘can’t sing’ (in a few seconds, I found this) — and then you might actually go take lessons. And then you’d probably feel a lot less embarrassed singing ‘Happy Birthday”, and more a part of a group when they burst into song (e.g. the national anthem), instead of really separate from it.
So just try this simple process on a number of beliefs:
- What do I believe? Identify it as best you can. Usually this will be a simple, declarative statement.
- What might I believe instead? Nothing too weird, but rather a change you can accept.
- What actions can I take based on that new belief? Even one is a good start.
- What might that lead to? You don’t have to know — and what you expect may well be wrong — but the possibility of a better situation is often highly motivating.
Please let me know what your experience is from this!
Hollis Polk is a personal coach (www.888-4-hollis.com), who has been helping people create lives they love for 15 years, using neurolinguistic & hypnotherapy techniques, decision science, clairvoyance & the common sense learned in 20+ years of business. She is an NLP Master Practitioner, hypnotherapist & has a BSE in engineering from Princeton & a Harvard MBA. She is also a successful real estate broker, investor & business owner.