If you’re lonely, or know someone who is…

You are not alone — in more ways than one. First, according to the NY Times:

A recent study by sociologists at Duke and the University of Arizona found that, on average, most adults only have two people they can talk to about the most important subjects in their lives — serious health problems, for example, or issues like who will care for their children should they die. And about one-quarter have no close confidants at all. [emphasis mine]

So there are lots of lonely people out there.

Second, each of us is surrounded by a number of discarnate beings, most of whom (I believe) are there to help us, whether we call them guides or angels, and who may include friends and family who have left their bodies while we are still in ours. Our job is to understand our connection to them, to “hear” what they are “saying”, and to feel their presence in our lives. You are never really alone, even if it feels that way at times.

What to do to have good friends here in the physical plane?

First off, you don’t make new old friends — so connect with the old ones!

Second, make new friends — meet new people in ways that you enjoy. If that isn’t possible through your work, maybe it is possible through volunteer work, or a church or community group, or groups of people who are interested in things you like to do. If you like to hike, try the Sierra Club. If you like to play bridge, find people who do that. But here is my favorite way to make new friends:

Learn skills to help your self-development, in particular, learn to become a practitioner of whatever method appeals to you. Why? First, these classes foster openness, and draw to them the type of people who are also willing to be open. These are the people you are most likely to be able to confide in. After all, after Chris has helped you conquer your dread of long car trips, without laughter or ridicule, and you’ve helped Chris eliminate a cat allergy, you can probably trust each other with an awful lot. And both you and Chris will have some skills to help each other with whatever comes up. Second, these classes are not one shot — you usually show up for several weekends, over several months, so there are lots of opportunities to interact, both in these deeper exercises and in informal ways, like having lunch. Yes, it’s a commitment, but that’s what learning, and self-development, and true friendship all take.

Hollis Polk is a personal coach (www.888-4-hollis.com), who has been helping people create lives they love for 15 years, using neurolinguistic & hypnotherapy techniques, decision science, clairvoyance & the common sense learned in 20+ years of business. She is an NLP Master Practitioner, hypnotherapist & has a BSE in engineering from Princeton & a Harvard MBA. She is also a successful real estate broker, investor & business owner.